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Kim Potgieter stamping her starfish serviettes using blue paint.

Maybe we’re playing life a little too safe

Written by Kim Potgieter on . Posted in Kim's Blogs, Play. No Comments on Maybe we’re playing life a little too safe

Have you ever thought, just out of the blue,
life feels a little too familiar… a little too you?

The same routines, the same places, the same easy way,
everything working well… just the same every day.

I had that thought, and my friend Jean did too,
we like what we like… it’s what we always do.

We stick to what’s easy. We stay with what we know,
it’s comfortable living… but not where we grow.

So we made a decision, for goodness’ sake,
to shake things up a little… to see what it would take.

To be a little less boring in the choices we make,
and not play it so safe… just for comfort’s sake.

(Now what do you know … I’ve even written my very first poem.)

So this year, my friend Jean and I decided we would take turns choosing something new to try.
And the best part? The other person wouldn’t be allowed to say no.

I went first.

I took Jean to something called Secret Sunrise. If you’ve never heard of it, it involves dancing at sunrise with a group of strangers, all wearing headphones, and all far more comfortable with dancing in public than we were. It’s definitely not something either of us would normally do. But that was the point.

And… you can’t say no.

So there we were, dancing at sunrise, slightly out of our comfort zones, and completely surprised by how much we enjoyed it. And we kept going.

Next was Jean’s turn, and she took me to “Pink Mamas” – a restaurant in Rosebank where everything is pink, sprinkled with pastel hues and vintage accents. Not my usual choice, but fun in a way I didn’t expect.

Because you can’t say no.

Then we spent a morning doing block printing, where I made serviettes with little sea creatures on them. Again, not something I would normally do.

But you can’t say no.

Women at a table stamping on to fabric serviettes smiling at the camera.
Octopus stamping done on a fabric serviette.

And I found myself completely absorbed. Learning something new, meeting new people, and enjoying it far more than I expected. Next on the list is a French cooking course, and possibly a big international concert. It’s my turn now.

Jean can’t say no.

The point is not what we’re doing but rather what it’s doing to us. There’s something about stepping outside your comfort zone that wakes you up a little. You feel more present, more engaged, more open. And it’s much easier when you’re not doing it alone.

If you’re looking for a simple way to start, you could try what Jean and I are doing. Take turns with a partner, a friend, or your spouse. You choose one month. They choose the next. And the only rule is: you can’t say no.

What I’ve realised is how easy it is to settle into doing things the same way, simply because it’s comfortable. But the world awaits, and there’s so much out there to explore.

You just have to say yes!

Or, in our case… You just can’t say no.

The gift of life after being given 12 months to live

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Why setting intentions and having something to look forward to helps in the hardest chapters

Helen created her first vision board at one of our client events at the beginning of 2025. A few months later, she was told she might only have twelve months to live.

That kind of news changes everything. It brings time into sharp focus. And yet every day Helen stood in front of the board she had framed and hung on her door, focusing on living today and planning for the future, with faith at the centre of it all.

She made a decision to make those months count.

At the beginning of 2026, Helen was back vision boarding with us again. She shared that she never imagined something so simple would become such an important part of her life. That small board became something to hold onto during one of the hardest chapters she has ever faced.

The power of seeing your future

One of the reasons we create vision boards with our clients is that they help us clarify what we are moving towards. When your future becomes visible, your focus shifts and you are reminded of where to place your energy and attention. During times of change, that clarity can become an anchor, and for Helen, it did exactly that.

Helen’s story

Helen has been living with cancer for several years. She was first diagnosed with ovarian cancer in 2018 and went through chemotherapy. For a while, life settled again and things felt more normal.

But the cancer returned.

In 2022 doctors discovered a tumour on her aorta and she faced another six months of intensive treatment. That same year, just two months after finishing treatment, her husband passed away unexpectedly.

At the beginning of 2025 Helen received more difficult news. Doctors discovered another tumour, this time in her spleen, and she began chemotherapy again. It was during this chapter that she joined our vision board workshop and created her first vision board.

A few months later she was told she might only have twelve months to live.

With the help, support and facilitated tough conversations of her Planners, Craig and Heino, Helen began putting her affairs in order. But she also made a decision: she chose to focus on how she wanted to live. She made changes to her health, held onto her faith, and kept coming back to what mattered most, including the hope of seeing her daughter and her two granddaughters who live in Singapore.

Looking forward

Helen eventually had surgery to remove her spleen, and today she is cancer free.

When she shared her story at this year’s workshop, it wasn’t just what she had been through that stayed with us. It was her courage to come back, to sit in that room again, and share her experience.

There is something so powerful about coming together like this. You realise you are not doing this alone.

This year, Helen’s vision is captured in three simple words:

Live. Love. Laugh.

And there is one image on her board that means more than anything else: her daughter and her two granddaughters in Singapore. She wasn’t able to make that trip in 2025, but she is planning it now.

Our Gift to You

We don’t always get to choose what happens to us, but we do get to choose how we respond. Taking time to think about what still matters, what you still want to experience, and how you want to spend your time can change the way you move through even the most difficult chapters.

If you haven’t done this in a while, this may be a good moment to pause. We’ve created a Vision & Money Journal to help you reflect and turn your thinking into intention.

Download the Journal by clicking on this link.

Having something to look forward to is more powerful than we realise. It gives us direction, and sometimes, it gives us the strength to keep going when life feels uncertain.

Why forgetting a name isn’t the whole story

Written by Kim Potgieter on . Posted in Health, Kim's Blogs. 4 Comments on Why forgetting a name isn’t the whole story

I was mid-sentence when it happened. The name was right there. I could see the person’s face. I could hear the story. But the name was gone.

So I paused and consulted my personal librarian, the one who curates my brain’s filing system.

“Do you have any idea,” she says, gesturing around her, “how many files you’ve given me to manage?”

And it’s true. Decades of conversations. Clients. Family stories. Lessons. Books. Travel. Loss. Growth. Thousands of names. Thousands of stories.

Eventually, the answer arrives, usually later, often when I’ve stopped trying so hard to remember.

Can you relate? That moment when a name or memory is just out of reach. It can be frustrating.

It was Arthur Brooks who introduced me to the idea of our “personal research librarian,” the part of the brain tasked with sifting through a vast archive of lived experience. The moment I understood that my librarian, slightly slow and perhaps a little disheveled, has an enormous job to do, something shifted. I stopped blaming myself and started appreciating the size of the library.

In From Strength to Strength, Brooks explains that when we are younger, we rely heavily on fluid intelligence. That is the quick thinking, rapid recall, and ability to solve new problems fast. As we grow older, fluid intelligence may soften, but crystallised intelligence strengthens.

Crystallised intelligence is built from experience. It is pattern recognition, judgement and wisdom. It is the ability to teach, guide and connect ideas across decades.

Brooks suggests that happiness in the second half of life depends on recognising this shift, accepting it, and learning how to use it well. This really resonates with me. It reminds me of something Viktor Frankl once wrote. Early in life, he said, we tend to ask, “What can I expect from life?” Later, the question changes to, “What does life expect of me?”

That feels like the heart of crystallised intelligence.

Perhaps this chapter is not about trying to think the way we did at thirty. Maybe it’s about asking how our experience, our judgement and our perspective can serve something bigger than ourselves.

I see this in my new role at Chartered. My work has shifted. I am less focused on doing everything myself and far more energised by mentoring, teaching, offering counsel and being of service. I enjoy guiding younger planners and bringing perspective. And I have realised that this kind of contribution feels deeply satisfying.

So yes, I look after my brain. I exercise, I challenge it with new tasks (I am now surprisingly competent at setting up smart TVs and installing remote controls) and use supplements like creatine and magnesium. I’ve also found that meditation really helps with focus and clarity.

But in the end, acceptance may be the most powerful support of all.

This chapter of life may ask us to use our gifts differently, with less rush and more wisdom, less proving and more serving.

And that, I think, is a beautiful trade.

What ‘Enough’ really means in retirement

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Living well with what we have, and staying focused on what matters most.

So many of us reach this stage of life and start asking new questions: Are we spending too much – or too little? Are we making the most of the years ahead? Is this the life we imagined, and will we have enough to sustain us?

One of the biggest fears people share in retirement is whether they will have enough. The truth is that almost everyone I meet has had to adjust some part of their original plan. The world has changed, the cost of living has changed, we’re living longer – and in many cases, our dreams have changed too.

Retiring in a changing world

Retirement simply isn’t what it used to be. It’s not a full stop, but a comma – a pause before we write the next line of our story.

At Chartered, our conversations have never been about when you will retire, but about what Retiremeant™ may really look like for you – what you’ll be retiring to. At the heart of this conversation is how we find meaning, live purposefully, and stay engaged with the world from a place of worthiness.

When the numbers don’t quite add up

Sometimes the numbers don’t align with the life we imagined. If you’re not where you’d like to be financially, ask: What can I do now to create the future I want – with what I have today? There’s always something we can adjust or rethink.

For some, that’s meant letting go of a larger home and discovering the relief of simpler living. For others, it’s meant continuing to work – not because we have to, but because staying connected and purposeful adds meaning to our days. And for many, it’s been about redefining what enough looks like now.

It’s not about how much we have – it’s how intentionally we live

What I’ve learnt over the years is that fulfilment comes from shaping your time, energy, and money around what matters most – and adjusting as life unfolds.

I recently spoke to Business Day TV about this very topic: how to bridge the gap between our retirement dreams and today’s reality, and why it’s never too late to reimagine the life you want.

Watch the interview here

Coming back to ‘Enough’

In the end, enough isn’t a number – it’s a feeling of alignment. It’s knowing that your money supports the life you value most. Living with purpose and gratitude helps us see that ‘enough’ has less to do with what we have, and everything to do with how we live.

Out with the old. In with the new.

Written by Kim Potgieter on . Posted in Kim's Blogs, Purpose. 1 Comment on Out with the old. In with the new.

Spring has a way of reminding us to clear out what no longer serves us. We declutter cupboards, tidy gardens, and refresh our homes. But our money habits can also pile up over the years. And not all of them help us live the life we want today.

This season is a wonderful time to pause and ask: What’s working? What needs to change? What can I let go of?

The habits that shape our second chapter

Habits play a big role in shaping the life we live. They influence the small decisions we make every day, and over time, they guide the bigger picture of our second chapter.

I read a beautiful quote by D.H. Lawrence this week: “Life is ours to be spent, not to be saved.” For me, that speaks to the balance we’re all trying to find. Yes, we need habits that keep us secure and financially on track, but not at the cost of living fully and enjoying what we’ve worked so hard for.

Over the years, I’ve seen how some habits can hold people back. Perhaps you’ll recognise one or two:

  • Avoiding your bank balance because it feels overwhelming.
  • Feeling guilty about spending, even when you’ve planned well.
  • Postponing experiences and moments of joy you can afford, worrying you’ll run out.
  • Always putting others’ needs before your own financial goals.
  • Avoiding new opportunities because it feels safer to stick with old routines.

But there are habits that support us: checking in with your budget or planner, setting boundaries when family asks for financial help, and using your money with intention to create memories, invest in your well-being, and live with joy.

It’s worth reflecting: Which habits are still serving me, and which no longer fit the life I want to live?

Start small – one change at a time

Think of it like gardening. You don’t replant the whole bed in a single afternoon; you start with one patch. It’s the same with habits.

Maybe it’s reviewing your monthly statement for subscriptions you no longer use. Maybe it’s saying “yes” more often and trying something new. Or perhaps it’s starting a “what if” conversation with your partner or family.

Small steps create awareness – and awareness creates change.

Spring reflections

Why not use this time to choose one habit to nurture or one to release?

  • What do you want more of in this chapter of life?
  • Which habits will help you get there?
  • Which ones no longer fit the life you want to live?

Even the smallest change can bring fresh energy and a splash of sunshine into your days. Wishing you a bright and colourful spring season.

How lucky are we – turning ordinary days into reasons to be grateful

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We may not have a national Thanksgiving Day in South Africa. No parades. No pumpkin pie. And definitely no turkey. But that doesn’t mean we can’t create our own version to say thank you. Not just in our heads, but out loud – in small, meaningful ways that remind the people around us they matter.

August has given us the perfect opportunity to pause and show gratitude to all the women who make the world a better place. I’m not sure I always stop long enough to tell the incredible women in my life just how much they mean to me. So instead of letting August pass in a blur, I’ve decided to turn it into a little personal celebration of gratitude. A reminder that the people who show up for us, stand by us, and cheer us on – deserve to be seen and appreciated. It doesn’t have to be grand gestures. Often, the most meaningful gift you can give is your time – to be present and make space for the important people in your life over the urgent to-do’s.

Gratitude doesn’t need an official day. But it does need practice.

We often think of kindness and generosity as gifts we give to others. But one of the most meaningful gifts we can give ourselves is time to reflect. I keep a gratitude journal – it’s something I’ve shared often and continue to do every day. It’s a small ritual that reminds me how much there is to be thankful for.

It’s also a good time to check in with yourself. If something feels heavy – like an obligation, or a commitment that drains rather than energises you – maybe it’s a sign to let it go. If it feels light, joyful, or meaningful, say yes. Sometimes the most generous thing you can do is to honour your own energy and move through your days with more lightness.

Replacing “I have to” with “How lucky am I to…”

I loved reading something Brent Lindeque from Good Things Guy recently shared on social media. He spoke about a simple mindset shift to lift your day – replacing “I have to” with “I get to.” It’s such a small change – but a powerful one. It reminds us that the things we so often dread – errands, family obligations, shopping, cooking, mowing the lawn – are the very things we’re lucky to have, and fortunate to do.

If you’d like to join me in my personal gratitude celebration quest, here’s a little challenge for the month ahead: Pick one, a few, or think of your own:

  • Turn “I have to” into “how lucky am I to”.
  • Be observant – noticing what someone truly needs or loves, and surprise them with it.
  • Call someone who’s made a difference in your life.
  • Give a compliment that costs nothing but means everything.
  • Offer to mentor someone or teach them a new skill.
  • Make time for the people who matter most, even when life feels busy.

Let’s find small ways to say, “You matter.” Because everything we do with love matters – to others and to the person we’re becoming along the way.

Why your next birthday should include a paintbrush

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“Art is a guarantee of sanity.”
French-American artist Louise Bourgeois

Did you know that Cuban-American artist, Carmen Herrera, sold her first painting at the age of 89? She had painted almost every day over six decades, not for fame or money, but simply because she loved it. She called painting her reason for being. And she kept going, well past 100, showing up in her New York studio with endless curiosity. She lived to 106.

There’s something powerful about staying curious, expressive, and playful. It may be one of the most important things we can do for a long and meaningful life. And research backs this up. Creative expression has been linked to better mental health, improved memory, and longer lives.

Picasso, Matisse, Monet – all continued creating well into their elder years. Henri Matisse turned to paper cut-outs in his 70s and 80s when illness made painting difficult. He called it “drawing with scissors in his second life” – and some say it was his most joyful work. Georgia O’Keeffe continued making art even after losing her eyesight. She lived to 98. And Louise Bourgeois, one of the most celebrated sculptors of the 20th century, only had her first major solo exhibition at 71. She worked almost daily until she died at 98.

Last month, I witnessed the power of creativity first-hand. A group of clients came together in Cape Town for an apron-painting workshop. On the surface, it may have looked like a morning of arts and crafts. But it was so much more. Laughter flowed as freely as the paint. There was connection, expression, and a wonderful reminder that doing something purely for the joy of it is reason enough.

As I’ve explored the science of creativity and ageing, I’ve discovered some fascinating facts. A study published in the Journal of Aging and Health found that people who regularly engage in creative activities report higher levels of happiness and life satisfaction. And research from Harvard suggests that creativity stimulates the brain in ways that help protect against cognitive decline.

Here are a few reasons why creativity deserves a place in your week:

  • It lifts your mood. Creative activity releases dopamine, the feel-good chemical that reduces anxiety and helps combat low moods.
  • It keeps your brain flexible. Creative hobbies like painting, writing, or even knitting activate different parts of the brain and improve memory.
  • It’s good for your health. Studies have shown that creative expression is linked to fewer illnesses, better immune function, and greater longevity.
  • It helps us connect. Creativity brings people together and keeps us connected to ourselves.

The best part? You don’t have to be an artist. Creativity lives in arranging flowers, cooking a beautiful meal, planting a new herb in the garden, or choosing a bright scarf simply because it makes you smile. If it brings you joy, it’s worth doing.

So, give yourself permission to play, whether it’s painting an apron, writing a few lines in a journal, doodling, baking, or rearranging your photos. Get messy. Experiment. And remember how good it feels to do something simply because it makes you happy.

From “I’m fine” to “Let me tell you how I really am”

Written by Kim Potgieter on . Posted in Health, Kim's Blogs. 2 Comments on From “I’m fine” to “Let me tell you how I really am”

We live in a world filled with noise, yet so many people feel unheard.

How often have you answered “I’m fine” when you’re not? Or asked someone how they are, only to get the same automatic reply in return? It’s become second nature – a routine that keeps things polite but not real.

I’m reminded of the lyrics from The Sound of Silence by Simon & Garfunkel – people “talking without speaking” and “hearing without listening.” We smile, we nod, and say we’re okay – even when we’re not. We hold our struggles close, ashamed to admit that things aren’t quite right. We feel the pressure to appear strong, capable, and in control … even when we’re falling apart inside. We tell ourselves that we should have it all figured out by now. But life doesn’t work that way. It’s full of transitions – emotional shifts, changing identities, evolving relationships. Transitions are messy. Life is messy. And sometimes, it’s just hard.

This is what I’ve learnt: you don’t have to do it alone.

At the moment, my husband and I are seeing a marriage counsellor. I’m not sharing this because it’s easy to talk about. I’m sharing it because it matters. Saying “we need help” isn’t a sign of weakness; it’s an honest, brave step towards understanding each other better, and creating space for growth and healing.

What worries me is how often we tiptoe around our struggles. We convince ourselves we’re the only ones feeling this way, holding our sadness, frustration, loneliness, and fear inside. And at the same time, we stop asking each other the real questions.

“How are you?” has become a script. A question we ask without really meaning it.
“I’m fine, thanks. And you?” – the rehearsed reply.

But what if we slowed down and really asked? What if we looked someone in the eyes and said, “No, really – how are you?” Sometimes, just knowing someone cares enough to listen is enough.

And when we stop pretending – when we speak our truth – something shifts.
We open the door to connection and support.
We make space for unexpected insight, comfort, and even solutions.

You might be surprised what happens when you say something out loud. It might be a book that finds you at the right moment. A conversation that shifts your perspective. A friend who says, “Me too.” Or a professional who gives you the tools to move forward.

So, if you’re carrying something silently, ask yourself: What would happen if I stopped trying to manage this on my own? What would it feel like to let someone in?

Life is far too precious to allow yourself to be stuck in silence. There is power in naming what you need, in choosing honesty over perfection, and in breaking the sound of silence.

The world doesn’t need your perfection. It needs your honesty.
And the people who love you – they want to know how you really are.

Life’s not a two-step. It’s a whole dance floor

Written by Kim Potgieter on . Posted in Kim's Blogs, Retiremeant. No Comments on Life’s not a two-step. It’s a whole dance floor

Some chapters of life feel like a gentle, graceful waltz. Others feel more like a fast-paced, dramatic tango. And sometimes, during life’s many transitions, we find ourselves dancing to a rhythm that no longer excites us. That’s your cue: it’s time to change the music.

We are not meant to tiptoe through the expanded version of midlife. And we’re not meant to repeat the same predictable steps in retirement, year after year. Life at this stage is far too rich for that. It’s filled with freedom and variety. It’s marked by transition after transition. The most powerful gift we can give ourselves in this chapter of life is to decide how we want to move through it – to keep checking in with ourselves, with our dreams, and what matters most.

This month, we hosted a Retire Successfully workshop in Cape Town – a room filled with 35 people aged between 50 and 80. Some were long retired, others just beginning to imagine what retirement might look like, and a few were navigating the unpredictability of midlife. The transitions were as varied as the people themselves.

One couple was struggling with the decision to move into a retirement village – one partner ready to embrace it, and the other not quite there yet. Some were adjusting to empty nests, moving cities, or looking for a fresh perspective on retirement. Others were dreaming of starting something new. One woman told me she keeps Midlife Money Makeover on her nightstand, calling it her “transition bible.”

But what struck me most wasn’t the variety of transitions or ages – it was the generosity in the room. When people open up and share their stories, something shifts. Those who have walked through difficult changes offer light to those just beginning. The wisdom flows both ways. Everyone leaves with a fresh insight, a new idea, or the reassurance that they’re not alone.

There’s no one way to navigate retirement. No formula. No choreography that works for everyone. But what I do know is this: we all need to check in with ourselves regularly and ask:

Am I still living the life I want to live – right now? What brings me joy? What have I been postponing?

Your best life at 60 might not be the same as your best life at 70. What brought you joy a year ago may not inspire you today. And what worked during the first few years of retirement may now need a new perspective.

So next time you wonder, “Is this it?” or are ready to try some new moves, listen to the rhythm that feels right for you. This is your invitation to keep showing up for yourself. Join us at our next workshop, check in with your planner, or have lunch with someone younger or older to share stories, inspire each other, and keep learning together.

The music may change, but the invitation remains: show up, be present, and live fully.

Love, Actually

Written by Kim Potgieter on . Posted in Kim's Blogs, Relationships. 2 Comments on Love, Actually

“If you look for it, I’ve got a sneaky feeling you’ll find that love actually is all around.”
Hugh Grant, Love Actually

Valentine’s Day often comes wrapped in red roses, chocolates, and grand gestures. But if you take a step back, you’ll see that love is actually something much simpler – and far more powerful. It’s in the quiet moments we take for granted – the everyday kindness, the way we show up. It’s in the breathtaking bear hug that makes you feel safe, the soft, gentle embrace that whispers, I see you, I’m here, and I care. It’s in the deep listening that makes someone feel truly seen. Because love is what we give of ourselves.

Love without expectation

Love doesn’t always have to result in something more. It does not have to be a date, a phone call, or dinner. Love sometimes simply exists in a moment. Shared and appreciated for what it is. One of the most unforgettable moments in Love Actually is when Mark stands at Juliet’s door, silently expressing his love through a series of handwritten cue cards. He knows his love is unreciprocated, but still, he chooses to honour it. As he walks away, he tells himself:

“Enough. Enough now.”

It’s a moment of love expressed without expectation – not to change anything, but simply to say I see you, I care for you, and then to let go.

A love letter to life

Love isn’t just about romance. It’s in how we choose to live our lives, how we love ourselves, the friendships we treasure, and the family who fills our hearts. It’s in a heartfelt conversation with a best friend, listening to a favourite song, or familiarity with watching your favourite movie over again.

And sometimes, love is best expressed in the simplest ways:

  • Listening. Not to respond, not to fix – just to hear someone.
  • Touching. A warm hug, a squeeze of the hand, a reassuring pat on the back.
  • Showing up. Being present, being there, making someone feel valued simply by giving them your time.

Rediscovering romance

It’s easy to take love for granted. Maybe you’ve loved and lost. Maybe you’re in a relationship where love has settled into quiet familiarity. Or maybe you’re still searching for a new connection. Wherever you find yourself, never give up on love. Romance does not have to be extravagant. It can be as simple as being brave enough to speak to someone new, taking a morning walk with someone you love, sharing a cup of coffee, or listening – really listening – even if you’ve heard the story before.

This year, I’ve set an intention to practice random acts of kindness, spreading love in small, unexpected ways. Maybe you’d like to join me? It could be as simple as leaving a note for someone, paying a compliment, or calling an old friend just to check in.

Because, at the end of the day, love is about reminding people that they are loved.

Embracing the Power of AND in 2025

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What if this year could be about having it all? About embracing all of life’s possibilities – not “this or that,” but this AND that? For me, 2025 started with the simple yet powerful reminder that life isn’t an either-or choice: you don’t have to sacrifice one thing for another. We don’t have to limit ourselves or put our dreams in boxes. We can embrace all of it!

Last year, I felt a bit lost navigating my empty nest. But this year started differently, with my vision board centred around a single word: AND. It’s incredible how a small word can carry such a big meaning. You can be retired AND find new purpose. You can spend time on yourself AND give back to your community. You can enjoy today AND plan for tomorrow. You can be driven and successful AND embrace the emotional aspects of being human. You can be happy AND sad. It’s about embracing the full spectrum of life.

The Bucket Wheel® is a great way to incorporate AND into your life. Think about the eight areas of life – work, play, purpose, health, giving back, relationships, learning, and money. Where are you choosing ‘either/or’ when you could embrace AND? Could you focus on your health AND strengthen relationships, give back AND prioritise fun, plan your dream trip AND learn something new?

As I step into my new role as Managing Director, I’m carrying AND into how I lead. Brené Brown says leadership is about seeing potential in others and helping them grow. This year, I’m committed to teaching AND learning – asking more questions, listening closely (especially to the quieter voices in the room) and creating opportunities for everyone’s gifts to shine.

I’ve even made an agreement with a team member: he’ll teach me SharePoint and new tech tools to help me work smarter, and in return, I’ll teach him the emotional intelligence needed to build business relationships. It’s a reminder that no matter your age or stage of life, there’s always something to learn AND something to share.

We also want to hear from you!

Complete our short five-minute survey to share your thoughts, interests and priorities, and enter the lucky draw for a Babylonstoren Hamper. Your feedback will help us shape our communication this year.

Click here to take the survey!

Here’s to a year of purpose, connection, and the power of AND.

Each step counts toward living your best life

Written by Kim Potgieter on . Posted in Health, Kim's Blogs. No Comments on Each step counts toward living your best life

I have learned that true purpose is not found in one grand pursuit but in the quiet moments of joy, the things we love, and the dreams we allow ourselves to follow every day.

This year, at the age of 56, I ran the Berlin Marathon—achieving my ‘wildly improbable dream!’ Just six weeks later, I became a grandmother for the first time. What I’ve learned is that age doesn’t define you. It just gives you better stories to tell. Yes, running the marathon stretched me in ways I hadn’t anticipated, but when we step beyond what feels comfortable, we grow in ways we never imagined. Each step brings us closer to living a life with fewer regrets.

Dreams are rarely smooth journeys. They challenge us to push through discomfort, teach us to embrace vulnerability, and show up even when there’s no guarantee of success. For me, this year wasn’t just about preparing for a marathon; it was about navigating the shifts of midlife. With all three of my children away from home, I found myself redefining my role as a mother and adjusting to a new chapter in my life. Training for the marathon tested my physical endurance, but the emotional side of empty nest was perhaps the hardest to navigate.

Through it all, I learned the power of small steps: consistently showing up, setting clear goals, and taking it one step at a time. I also came to appreciate having such an incredible support system. Their encouragement carried me through the toughest days and reminded me that life’s journey is best done with the special people in your life.

I’ve come to believe that the best way to look back on life without regret is to align your time with what matters most. Start by knowing where you want to go, then let your actions and decisions lead you there. The beautiful thing is that one dream often leads to another. Achieving a ‘wildly improbable dream’ fills you with a sense of possibility and self-belief. You start to see that you can achieve anything you set your heart on.

Imagine what’s possible if you gave yourself permission to pursue your wildly improbable dreams. This newsletter is filled with inspiring stories of clients who have done just that—finding joy, purpose, and creating lasting memories along the way. Perhaps purpose is simply doing what you love, each experience and memory you make adding a new chapter to who you are.

Chasing My Dream, Crossing the Line

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Have you ever had a dream—something you’ve always wanted to do but hesitated to pursue, afraid you might fail? Or perhaps you were too afraid to share, worried you may not succeed. For me, that dream was running the Berlin Marathon. Two years ago, I put it on my vision board and called it my “Wildly Improbable Dream.” It wasn’t just about the race—it was about pushing my limits and proving that I could achieve anything I set my mind to.

In September this year, my dream came true. At the age of 56, I ran through the streets of Berlin in one of the largest marathons in the world. The joy on my face tells the story! Every photo along the route shows a beaming smile, no matter how tired I felt. But dreams aren’t supposed to be easy. As Kahlil Gibran said, “The deeper that sorrow carves into your being, the more joy you can contain.” The resilience it took to keep going when the road got tough made this dream even more meaningful.

Here are the lessons I learned from chasing my dream:

The first step was knowing why I wanted to do this. Sure, I wanted to test my limits, but it was more than that. This dream allowed me to combine all my greatest loves: running, travelling, and learning. Along the way, I explored beautiful cities across Europe, learned new recipes at Toscana Saporita in Tuscany, and took in the sights of Italy—a true celebration of everything that brings me joy.

Small steps, big gains
The secret to success? Consistency. I learned from Atomic Habits that improving by just 1% every day adds up to being 37 times better over time. So, I stuck to my running schedule, rain or shine. I consistently got up early and pushed through tough days—even when life tried to get in the way.

Setbacks aren’t stop signs
Of course, setbacks happen. After Covid, I had complications with my heart rate that I monitored closely throughout training. And getting into the marathon wasn’t easy either. After trying and failing to register through the organisers, the lottery, travel agents, and charities, I nearly gave up. But my support group encouraged me to try one last time, and miraculously, a spot opened, and I finally got my chance.

Your support system is everything
The night before the marathon, fear crept in. I was nervous—what if I couldn’t do it? But then came the messages from my sons, Josh and Ryan, and from my friends and Gabi, all cheering me on. Their encouragement made such a difference. As I stood at the starting line, tears in my eyes, I knew I wasn’t doing this alone. Their support carried me, step by step.

Have fun
When the whistle blew, I reminded myself of something important—I wasn’t just here to run; I was here to enjoy every minute. I kept my pace steady, only walking through the water stations, and savoured every moment. That feeling of joy and pride has stuck with me since.

One dream leads to another
Achieving a wildly improbable dream gives you a sense of limitless possibility. Once you’ve crossed that finish line, it feels like no challenge is too great, no goal too far out of reach. You start believing that you can achieve anything you set your mind to.

So, what would you do if you weren’t afraid to fail? Chase your wildly improbable dream with all your heart!

A sprinkle of luck goes a long way

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“What now?” is a thought that has been on my mind a lot this year as I navigate my empty nest. My role as a mother has changed – it’s different now – but there’s a space that I need to fill with something else. I have been exploring new challenges and embracing new opportunities that push me to grow, and what I’ve learnt in this process is that stepping out of your comfort zone doesn’t just require courage – it might also take a little bit of luck.

Running in the Berlin Marathon has been on my vision board for the past two years. It was meant to be a gift to myself during this empty nest year, but it has made me question my gift-giving capabilities. This gift has sometimes felt more like a punishment – just over 42km of running is no walk in the park! But there’s something about the challenge that has drawn me in. I’m spending hours training and cultivating the habit of running, and one of the pros of this time on the road is that it gives me time to think. I’ve learnt the art of perseverance and patience, but I’ve also come to realise that a sprinkle of luck can change everything.

Entry into the Berlin Marathon is via a lottery system, which I duly entered at the end of last year but didn’t get in. Very disappointed but still determined, I turned to other ways to gain entry, charities and travel agencies, with no luck. Just as I thought the dream was slipping through my fingers, a spot opened – as if the universe was giving me a nudge. Out of the blue, I received the message: I could participate.

Sometimes, the best-laid plans need a little help from the unpredictable forces of life. You can prepare, train, and do everything right, but outcomes are not always in our control. Morgan Housel beautifully writes in The Psychology of Money: “Luck and risk are both the reality that every outcome in life is guided by forces other than individual effort…The accidental impact of actions outside of your control can be more consequential than the ones you consciously take.”

It’s not that effort doesn’t matter; it’s just that life, with its infinite moving parts, has a way of surprising us. The key is to keep showing up and putting yourself out there – even if success isn’t guaranteed. Sometimes, that little bit of luck makes all the difference.

Our very own Olympic medallist, Tatjana Smith, embodies this idea perfectly. After winning her gold and silver medals, she said something that stuck with me: “On any other day, any other swimmer could have taken gold. We are not better than each other; that day was just my day.”

This isn’t to say we must depend on luck alone. It’s a reminder that when you dare to try something new, you may be surprised at how the stars can sometimes align in your favour. Preparing for the Berlin Marathon has taught me never to say “I can’t” and to challenge myself in ways I never thought possible. It’s also taught me to leave a little space for luck.

So, don’t be afraid to take the leap. Yes, there will be bumps along the way. Sometimes, things won’t go as planned. But keep showing up. Keep saying yes to new experiences. And who knows? With a bit of perseverance and maybe even a dash of luck, you might find yourself achieving something you never thought possible.

Your Lifeline – The Rest is Still Unwritten

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By now, we are well-acquainted with the notion that nothing in life is constant except for change (and taxes, of course!). While it’s tax season, don’t worry, that’s not the focus today. Instead, I want to talk about the kind of change that transforms your life and demands that you reassess your path forward.

I recently presented a workshop where I shared my insights from Chip Conley’s Learning to Love Midlife course. What struck me about this phase of life, which Conley suggests can last up to the age of 75 – or even longer – is how many transitions we navigate. It’s rarely just one change at a time – but a convergence of many shifts all at once. Many participants struggled with significant transitions intertwined with unexpected changes and emotional turmoil. These ranged from relocation and relationship changes to physical and psychological challenges, losing loved ones, changes in how we approach work, and often, a deep search for meaning and purpose.

Navigating difficult situations

Do you sometimes feel overwhelmed by a transition, as if you’re drowning in doubt and uncertainty – wishing someone would throw you a lifeline? The good news is that you have your very own lifeline – filled with the lessons and wisdom you’ve accumulated and applied throughout your life. Imagine your life as an unwritten book, with each new day offering a blank page waiting for your mark. Your past experiences provide the inspiration to write your future, helping you navigate the complexities and challenges of trying times. Of course, music can also be a great companion for finding solace.

Drawing your Lifeline

To give you an idea of what this exercise is about, here is a snapshot of the most recent part of mine. It involves reflecting on your life so far and identifying the stories that shaped who you are today. Include all the key moments of your life, from birth to the present day. Everything above the middle line represents high points, and everything below the line represents low points that made you feel unhappy or challenged.

Reflect on your Lifeline

What lessons can you take from your timeline?
Are there any significant themes?
What (and who) helped you through your lows; what (and who) supported you during your highs?
What strengths did you find to help you through your lows?
Is there anything you could or would have done differently, knowing what you know now?
Can you document all the lessons and wisdom you have gained?

Embrace your Inner Strengths

When I look at my lifeline, I reflect on what each story is teaching me and what I can learn from every transition. I consider the strengths that helped me through previous difficult situations and think about how I can draw on those strengths now. It’s often your inner strength that pulls you through.

I do believe that things happen for a reason and that the story of your life is a powerful teacher. And then there’s always music! In times of change, I often turn to music. Natasha Bedingfield’s song Unwritten reminds me that there are always ways to find comfort and strength in the unwritten possibilities ahead.

I hope the lifeline exercise benefits you as much as it’s helping me right now. If you’re looking for a song to draw, reflect on, and work to, here’s a link to Unwritten: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=b7k0a5hYnSI

Don’t sweat the big goals!

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Small Habits – Big Impact

I just crossed the finish line at my second Two Oceans Half Marathon! It may seem like a small victory, but it’s a big win for me and one that I celebrate proudly. Running a marathon was never really my main goal – but exercise and fitness have always been important to me. Don’t misunderstand me; when I first started running, it didn’t go exactly as planned. It’s tough getting up early mornings, and it’s much easier to hit the snooze button, especially on cold winter mornings or lazy weekends.

James Clear’s book Atomic Habits profoundly impacted my life, and his words deeply resonated with me:

“If you want to predict where you’ll end up in life, all you have to do is follow the curve of tiny gains or tiny losses and see how your daily choices will compound ten or twenty years down the line.”

So, I followed James Clear’s advice to cultivate smaller, achievable habits rather than pursuing big, audacious goals. Instead of setting out to run a marathon, I focused on tiny gains (consistent, small habits) and became a habitual runner. And the best part is that habits become part of your lifestyle over time.

I truly believe that the only way to look back at your life without regret is to align your time with what’s most important to you. So firstly, know where you want to go, and then make sure that your actions, decisions, and the time you spend on them allow you to achieve that goal.

Too often, we convince ourselves that big success requires big actions. But success is the product of small, repeated actions or habits – no matter what your dreams are, you can achieve them with the right habits. It’s the same principles I teach my midlife clients about investing: accumulating wealth is not a skill; it’s a habit. If you persevere, consistently save, and live below your means, you can cultivate the right habits to build wealth.

Reflect for a moment on the path of your life and where your daily actions are leading you. What you don’t want is to look back and wish you’d spent more time doing the things you love. When you decide what’s most important in your life, you can start making small daily changes to ensure you align your time without regrets. It’s the tiny steps you take that will eventually change everything!

Once I established a consistent routine around my health and fitness goals, it opened the door to stacking other important goals – like learning and travelling. I am busy planning to participate in the Berlin Marathon in September. It’s quite a stretch, seeing that I’ve only run 21km races so far (I really have to up my game to run this 42km marathon), but this isn’t just about the run. It’s about combining my broader intentions of travelling and learning with destination runs.

Let every tiny step be a celebration of moving closer to the life you envision.

The Freedom to Be … with permission, of course

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Have you ever found yourself standing on the edge of a decision, just waiting for someone to say it’s ok before you take the plunge? To give you the approval for what you’d like to do? Or stop yourself from doing something because it feels unfamiliar? You’re not alone. It’s human nature. We all hold ourselves back sometimes.

But what if the only permission slip you truly need is from yourself? Why not write yourself a ‘permission slip’ and give yourself the freedom – and permission – to feel, behave, and live exactly as you want to? Within reason (and your spending plan), of course…

Brené Brown uses the term’ permission slips’ as a way to allow yourself to feel (or do something) that might be out of your comfort zone or that’s new to you. It’s similar to the ones we, as parents, received from school, allowing our children to go on school outings. Last week, I was immersed in the Learning to Love Midlife workshop presented by Chip Conley at the Elder Academy. I was completely taken aback when a ‘learning to surf’ activity was suggested! I’m 55 and have never surfed before! Why try now? My initial response was quickly followed by another voice: what if I hurt myself? And then, “What if I can’t do it – and embarrass myself?”

What I really needed to do was give myself permission not to think about everything that could possibly go wrong but rather to focus my energy on thinking how cool it would be to actually feel what it’s like to surf, to try something new, and to expand myself instead of limiting what could be possible.

So yes! I surfed! Loved it and even managed to stand on the board and ride a wave! Of course, I had an instructor who helped me each step of the way – and in all honesty, the wave was very small! But I surfed in Mexico; more than that, it’s given me the confidence to try new things.

Sometimes, we hold ourselves back, waiting for permission, or do things just to gain approval. Other times, we avoid doing them completely for fear of disappointing someone close to us. This behavioural pattern often plays out within our closest relationships. Asking for permission can also become a convenient excuse – “We would have loved to, but our children advised us against it.” Deep down, we’re actually just looking for a reason not to.

It seems that at Chartered, we’ve become quite the go-to when it comes to tricky financial requests from the family. Next time the question of lending money to your adult children comes up, have your answer ready: ‘Sorry, we’d love to help, but Kim and Jason looked at the numbers and advised us not to.’ And yes, when it’s time to treat yourself and go on that trip, count on us to cheer you on: “Of course, financially, you are absolutely able to take that trip!”

As we promise to give ourselves permission to try new experiences, it’s important to consider the impact on our financial planning. Sometimes, we all need objective advice, especially regarding our money and financial security. Your Planning Specialist knows exactly how your actions will impact your planning and will always be available to give you objective advice and guidance without compromising your financial wellness – ensuring that your money is aligned with your life.

Beyond wrapping paper, The presence and the past

Beyond the wrapping paper
The Present of Presence

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Beyond the wrapping paper
The Present of Presence

It’s November, and the holiday season is just around the corner – another year gone by in the blink of an eye. It’s been a whirlwind year, and I am slightly apprehensive about the possibility of getting lost in the fluster of holiday shopping and the quest for the perfect gift. Don’t get me wrong, I absolutely love shopping and find no greater joy than spoiling my special people with beautifully wrapped presents. But what if the most precious gift we can offer can’t be wrapped? What if the true essence of giving lies in something far more valuable than a tangible gift – our presence.

We’ve had a wonderful year together as you joined me in embracing the present moment, stepping out of our comfort zones and going on many first-time, brand-new adventures! It’s been an absolute privilege sharing all my new experiences with you, and I loved hearing all your stories of new roads travelled, slow and easy excursions venturing into undiscovered places, moving to new homes, cities and provinces, and forgotten hopes and dreams turning into realities.

As we wrap up this year, I have one final challenge for you and myself: to prioritise ‘Presence over Presents.’

This year has taught me that the moments we share hold more value than the things we own and the dreams we accumulate. But creating these memories can be challenging as it calls for the most personal of gifts – our time. Something we often don’t always have enough of. And this is the hard part – and certainly one of my most significant challenges: giving my time and being fully present with the people I love while juggling a busy schedule.

So, let’s promise to try our best to give ourselves – and others – the gift of time and presence this holiday season. I am very excited about a two-week beach holiday with my family and friends, spending uninterrupted time with them and spoiling all my special people with delicious meals. This is my chance to make up for all the moments missed and create new memories.

Just in case you need more ideas: Why not invite your best friend for a delicious dinner instead of buying a gift? Spend the evening fully engaged, actively listening, and giving them your full attention. Or dedicate one device-free hour every evening for family time or self-reflection. Spend an afternoon helping at your favourite charity or schedule activities with your loved ones that you know they would love. If your granddaughter loves art, why not do pottery with her? Or arrange a movie and ice cream day with a grandson … build a bonfire and roast marshmallows. Write a heartfelt letter to someone you love or take a long walk with a family member.

Rick Warren, author of The Purpose Driven Life rightfully says: “Time is your most precious gift because you only have a set amount of it… When you give someone your time, you are giving them a portion of your life that you’ll never get back.”

Let’s embrace the true gift of connection, shared experiences and each other’s presence this festive season. Wishing you a wonderful holiday filled with joyous moments and the present of presence.

From rugby fields to empty nests

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And the promise to tackle foreboding joy in the scrum of life

I have shared all my first-time, brand-new, and exciting experiences with you every month this year. This month, I am standing on the edge, waiting for a significant change in my life – becoming an empty nester for the first time. My daughter, Gabi, will embrace her next chapter of studying Civil Engineering at Stellenbosch University next year. While I have so many mixed emotions ranging from pride, love and anticipation – to fear, dread and anxiousness, I remind myself to stay focused on the present and enjoy the time we have now, rather than be overwhelmed by the worries of next year.

Have you ever spent so much time worrying about the what ifs that the beautiful, joyous moments of the present pass you by? Do you find yourself constantly worrying about things that haven’t happened yet?

I’m incredibly proud of Gabi’s achievements and her choice to pursue a career in engineering. I love every minute of my time with her. Still, I constantly guard myself not to be overly concerned about everything that could possibly go wrong or pre-empting the dread of an empty home and losing those daily moments with her.

In a wonderful social media post, Brent Lindeque (The Good Things Guy) reminded me of a term called anticipatory grief – when you worry or grieve about things that haven’t happened yet (like many South Africans did 70 minutes into the Springbok-England Rugby World Cup Semi-finals). At the very least, we were all panicking just a little bit! I am convinced that only the bravest of us resisted grieving ahead of schedule!

But rugby aside, Brent makes a good point when he shares that South Africans may be in a constant state of anticipatory grief – waiting for the next corruption scandal, waiting to hear more bad news, waiting for load-shedding, more potholes, inflation, another war … Similarly, the concept foreboding joy, coined by Brené Brown, captures the internal conflict we feel when joy is immediately followed by worry and fear. We end up catastrophising, wasting our time worrying about things that haven’t happened, and in the process, we have no time or space left to embrace the joy and happiness of our present.

I’ve seen how the initial excitement of retirement can be replaced by fears and questions like “What will I do with my life?” or “Will my money last?” and “What if my health fails?” I have spoken to many people whose children are emigrating, and the fear and worry for their future start way before they leave the country. I’ve noticed how fear and worry can deter people from trying new things. It seems we are all constantly worrying, letting the impending fear of loss and change overshadow the potential joy of living in the present moment.

So, how do we move past this cycle of anticipatory grief? The answer, I believe, lies in being present. Embrace each moment fully and focus on gratitude, all the positive aspects of change, and the many new adventures that change will bring.

So, no anticipating grief this Saturday during the World Cup Rugby Final! No foreboding joy allowed! This is the 8th Rugby World Cup tournament that SA is playing; we’ve won the Cup three times and have never lost a final! There’s nothing to worry about.

Age ain’t nothing but a playlist track!

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My first-time not-unusual Delilah-cious encounter with Tom Jones

Okay, my article heading may be a bit too much! But if you’ve seen Sir Tom Jones perform “It’s Not Unusual” and “Delilah” live on stage, you might also find yourself humming to “Green Green Grass of Home” while watching the Springboks play in the Rugby World Cup.

Every year, Jean and I plan an overseas trip together, and we always add something new – a fresh experience that we’ll both enjoy. Just as we’ve done in the past by adding a Rod Stewart and Billy Joel concert to our itinerary, this year we chose a show featuring none other than Tom Jones in Germany.

At 83, Tom Jones is still rocking on! Thinking back on my first-time experiences this year, this one really hit home. Age is just a number, right? Not that anyone’s counting, but here was Tom Jones, who began his career in the 1960s, still performing his classics to a crowd of over 10,000 people – all loving his music. 83 is a number that may make many want to slow down or take things easy. But not him. He’s still busting the age myth, one tune at a time! It made me question the constraints I sometimes impose on myself due to age. Do I use my age as an excuse not to do certain things?

My father was a huge fan of Tom Jones, which is how I was introduced to his songs. This experience has reminded me of a dream I once had: to run in the Comrades Marathon using my late dad’s double green number. In fact, 81-year-old Johannes Mosehla broke a 34-year-old record this year by becoming the oldest runner to complete the Comrades. Still, running the Comrades is not for everyone, and for now, I am very happy with my achievement of having completed my first 21km race.

One thing that I was certainly not too old – or too young – to try was beer! An unusual choice for me. Beer is certainly not my preferred drink, but whilst at a Beer Festival, I thought, “Why not?” and gave it a go. The result? An unforgettable memory – one I will cherish and laugh about for years to come.

The true magic of this trip was sharing it with Jean, a truly special friend. I’ve mentioned Robert Waldinger’s Harvard research before, which finds that the secret to a long and healthy life lies in connections and close relationships with significant people. This may just be what inspired Tom Jones and Dolly Parton to write “Islands in the Stream.” Without our special people, the ones we love and those who make our souls sing, we are simply islands adrift in the stream of life.

Let’s promise ourselves not to let age hold us back and to cherish our connections in the flowing river of life,

How things can change in the blink of an eye

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Earlier this month, on a seemingly ordinary Saturday evening, on our way to meet our family for dinner, my husband Gys and I were involved in a car accident. Despite my car being written off and being very shaken, Gys and I escaped unscathed.

While the accident only took seconds, it felt like an eternity, and during those split seconds, I genuinely thought it might be the end for us. It was a terrifying wake-up call that reminded me how the course of our lives can be forever altered in a single second.

The following day, as I pondered the events, three crucial questions surfaced in my mind. Firstly, I asked myself, “Are my relationships in order? Have I expressed love and gratitude to those who mean the most to me?” And, in that moment of reflection, I found comfort in the fact that I had no unfinished business with those I hold dear. My children know how much I love them, and there’s no one important in my life who doesn’t know how I feel about them. It was a poignant reminder that, at the end of the day, it’s our relationships with others that enrich and adds meaning to our lives. We often neglect our relationships, putting off picking up the phone, spending time with family and friends, or telling people how we feel because we are busy. We assume we will have ample time, but this experience taught me that time is a gift we shouldn’t take for granted. We must take every opportunity to strengthen our bonds with family and friends, for we never know when those opportunities may be taken away from us.

The second question I asked was, “Am I doing everything I want in life?” Life is fleeting, and we must grab the opportunities when they present themselves. I firmly believe in living life intentionally, saying yes to experiences that bring me joy and fulfilment. While there are things I still want to do, I have no regrets about the things I have done and the experiences I have had.

The final question that came to mind was, “Are my affairs in order?” I found solace in knowing that my will was up to date, ensuring my family’s security. It is so important not to procrastinate when it comes to getting our affairs in order. Taking the necessary steps to prepare for the future is a responsible and caring act toward our loved ones.

I wholeheartedly encourage you to cherish your relationships, expressing your love and gratitude openly. Embrace life’s adventures. Don’t live a life looking back thinking “if only”; say yes to the things you genuinely desire. And most importantly, take the necessary steps to put your affairs in order, providing peace of mind for yourself and your family.

Say yes to life! Live every minute … every second

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This week I came across a beautiful inspirational story on Facebook about our very own Margaret Kearns, and to my surprise – Brent Lindeque (Good Things Guy.) Can you imagine inviting a complete stranger and famous influencer to your 70th birthday party? Someone who reaches over four million people every month on social media. Margaret’s daughters did! They knew how much their mom loved Brent and asked him as a surprise for her birthday. And best of all, Brent Lindeque said yes! He attended her 70th birthday party last year and celebrated her 71st birthday with her again this year!

This story made me realise how powerful the courage to ask is. If you don’t, ask, you’ll never know – right? And with that comes the courage to say YES to life … to live every minute and every second to your utmost. You never know where saying ‘yes’ will lead – you may make new friends, learn new lessons and perhaps experience more pockets of joy in every day.

I met Margaret quite a few years ago when she joined Chartered and immediately loved her optimistic outlook and attitude to life. She inspires wherever she goes; is one of the bravest women I know and a personal role model. Margaret took over running the finances when her husband passed away, enrolled and obtained her Degree in Anthropology and Sociology in her mid-60s, and still holds her family of three adult daughters together.

Inviting Brent Lindeque out of the blue to their mom’s 70th birthday is a testament to how Margaret’s courageous and adventurous spirit rubbed off on her children. Brent is the founder of Good Things Guy (launched in 2015) – a platform dedicated to telling good stories and sharing things that inspire. He shared a beautiful post on social media about his time spent with Margaret, her family and friends. “It was time spent perfectly,” he said. “I stepped out of my comfort zone and leaned in that day when I went to a birthday lunch with 29 random strangers. I spent the afternoon in the spectacular autumn sun, drinking champagne while listening to incredible women sharing stories of their time. It was beautiful. And a stark reminder that we only have so much time.” This year, Brent again shared the lesson he learnt from Margaret at her birthday party – to find a pocket of joy in every day.

I’ve reflected on all my first-time experiences this year to fulfil my goal of trying something new and different every month. Each encounter has brought a lesson – or shared one. This month I tried my awkward, non-artistic hand at ceramics with a friend and our daughters. We spent a wonderful day at the Prison Break Market Clay Café where I made a semi-decent piggy bank. Our housekeeper’s daughter, Abby, is turning one this year, and my goal is to start teaching her how to save – a lesson we taught our children from a young age.

If you feel motivated to say yes to life more often, to find more pockets of joy every day, or fill more time with fun and laughter, start by taking a small step out of your comfort zone. You don’t have to invite a famous influencer to your birthday or embark on the grandest of all adventures, just take a small step that sits comfortably with you. Try hopping on to Good Things Guy on Facebook for inspiration! Fun and laughter are contagious, and the more time we spend on good things, the more time we’ll invest in happiness and joy.

First time running the Two Oceans Marathon

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Yes! You read that right! I just completed my first time ever 21km half-marathon. The Two Oceans is known as “the world’s most beautiful marathon,” and running against the backdrop of the breathtaking Cape Peninsula must be one of the most exhilarating moments of my life. And this is the new experience I’m sharing with you this month.

I have learnt that having a clear goal is essential to trying something new or doing something for the first time. Running a half-marathon has been on my vision board for a few years, and you may remember me sharing it with you – even in Covid times. Two words stand out for me in achieving this goal: persistence and consistency. Believe me, getting up every single morning to run, especially in winter, is not easy. And your aim does not have to be easy either. You may decide to take up art or learn a musical instrument. You may want to walk the Camino de Santiago – or the Cape Camino. But every journey begins with one single step. And the first step is setting your goal. In my experience, persistence and consistency get you where you want to go.

Sometimes, trying out something new is a deeply personal journey you may want to go alone. But a lot of times, having special people join you – or support you – makes it so much easier – and enjoyable. I had many partners on my running journey, including my 22-year-old niece, Robyn. And thank goodness for Robyn! I was initially intent on running a 42km marathon, and Robyn convinced me to start slightly smaller – we agreed on the 21km instead. It turned out to be great advice! Running up and down the hills was much harder than I thought it’d be.

One of our Planning Specialists at Chartered, Craig Harrison, also ran with me. He could have finished the marathon in a much better time but opted to stay back and support me, for which I am so grateful. Although you’re the one doing the work, you end up not running alone. Running in the Two Oceans felt like being embraced in a wonderful community of people helping and supporting you to the end. And it was lovely to see my husband Gys, my son Josh and his partner Rachel waiting for me and welcoming me over the finish line.

Sometimes you may have to call in extra people to help you reach your goal. I have a great running trainer and teamed up with a functional trainer who helped me exercise the right muscles to get me over the steep hills.

It really does help to have a support system when trying new things. Whether planning a unique adventure, a fresh learning experience or a new venture, having people who believe in you and encourage you along the way can make all the difference. But more than that, trying new things often calls for stepping out of our comfort zones. It’s easy to get stuck in a routine and shy away from something new. But new experiences can lead to personal growth and a sense of accomplishment.

Remember, trying something new does not have to be a grand gesture but something small that pushes you out of your comfort zone. And the rewards are often worth it!

First time welcoming new members into our family

Written by Kim Potgieter on . Posted in Kim's Blogs, Relationships. No Comments on First time welcoming new members into our family

As first experiences go, becoming a mother-in-law and gaining a new daughter in the family – and of course, seeing the first of my children and my oldest son get married, is pretty epic. And this is my unique and new experience for March!

Adding a new experience to your month does not have to be something large, audacious or expensive. It could just be saying ‘yes’ to something you would not have considered doing before. What I’ve learnt from the three first-time experiences I have shared with you this year is that it always goes hand-in-hand with learning and something new to be grateful for.

Apart from having the best and most joyous time with family and friends at Ryan and Nix’s wedding at the beautiful Webersburg Wine Estate in the Cape, I feel incredibly blessed and privileged to see our family size increase with the very special and much-loved Nix. Still, becoming a mother-in-law for the first time can be daunting, and I’m sure Nix feels the same way about her becoming a wife and daughter-in-law. Getting married is a significant life-changing transition as you move into a new, unexplored and wonderful stage of life.

A few days before the wedding Nix and I chatted about our new future roles. We’ve all heard some horror mother-in-law stories – from criticism, stopping by unannounced to rearrange the furniture without being asked, and coercing the daughter-in-law to have children. Nix and I both felt that it would be helpful for us to set boundaries upfront so we don’t make assumptions about what we each value, trust and respect.

I realise that Nix and Ryan will live their new life together on their terms and in their own way – different from how we live our lives in our family. But I also know that we share common values which gives me a great sense of pride and joy.

Setting boundaries are not only important with in-laws; they are essential for creating trust and respect in any healthy relationship. And honouring the boundaries of others builds a strong connection where each one feels heard, seen and valued and where both your needs are met.

Boundary discussions are brave conversations to have. It’s talking about how you want to be treated and your expectations in the relationship. It also defines what’s acceptable and what is not. It’s brave because by setting boundaries, you value yourself, prioritise your needs and create space to thrive and grow. I love the fact that Nix and I understand each other’s boundaries. It makes me feel safe and secure knowing what she expects of me and what she values and appreciates. These discussions may seem hard at first, but it’s better than the resentment when boundaries are overstepped.

I found a helpful article on PositivePsychology.com written by Jo Nash, who obtained her PhD in Psychotherapy Studies and lectured in mental health at the University of Sheffield. She masterfully explains what boundaries are and how to set healthy ones. I love this explanation of the different boundaries involved in relationships.

READ: How to Set Healthy Boundaries & Build Positive Relationships

Do you have relationships in your life that may need redefined boundaries? Relationships change and evolve, and it may require an adjustment of boundaries. Remember, having boundaries are not selfish or self-centred. It really helps those you love with clear guidelines of how to treat and love you in a way you appreciate.

A first-time experience – learning in Africa

Written by Kim Potgieter on . Posted in Kim's Blogs, Learn. No Comments on A first-time experience – learning in Africa

I do believe that our experiences add to the richness and fullness of our lives, and that’s why I included new and unexperienced opportunities in my dreams for this year. I have made it my personal purpose to inspire all of you – our clients – to join me in this endeavour and hope that as we move through this year, you will also share your fresh new experiences with me. Who knows, we may end up with a novel guide to experience the unexperienced by the end of 2023.

My new experience in January was travelling to Africa on a learning excursion for the first time. Five of us from Chartered were invited and partly sponsored to participate in the Stanford Seed transformation programme – a Stanford Graduate School of Business-led initiative that provides management training to entrepreneurs in India and Africa. Their aim is to deliver world-class business training and resources to help entrepreneurs from promising start-ups and established companies take their businesses, countries and regions to the next level and transform lives.

The benefit to Chartered is immeasurable as we are trained in all aspects of running a business, from finance and Human Resources to strategy and developing a transformation plan for taking our company forward. As the programme leader whose role is to attend the actual training sessions and bring the learning back to Chartered, I have the magnificent added bonus of journeying and discovering Africa.

The first in-person immersion week took place in Nairobi, Kenya and in June this year, I will attend training in Accra, Ghana and then later in Botswana. I was slightly surprised when I realised that I’d never considered Africa as a learning destination before. I’ve been all over the world to attend courses: America with Brené Brown, Seth Godin, David Krueger and Chip Conley; and the UK with Mitch Anthony and George Kinder. But never Africa.

For me, spending time in Africa, our very own and second-largest continent in the world, was the most inspiring part of the training – a sentiment sincerely shared by the Stanford lecturers who said that coming to Africa and experiencing the beauty of not only this incredible continent but also its people, is the most rewarding part of their work.

Did you know that Africa contains 54 countries and is home to 3 000 indigenous tribes and around 2 000 languages and dialects? I remember telling people in America about Africa and thinking they were slightly uninformed when they knew nothing about our continent. But whilst in Nairobi, I realised that I didn’t know much about Africa either, apart from visiting game reserves. We spent time with people from cities all over the continent, some of which I had to find on the world map and others I’d never heard of before.

They do say that it’s not always the place you fall in love with, but the people – I can attest to that! I have never before spent time with a group of people who are so humble, so grateful for the international learning opportunity, and so enthusiastic about their work and this experience. Meeting so many aspiring entrepreneurs creating successful businesses has also left me with a profound sense of hope for Africa.

I love the fact that I’ve experienced a part of the world that I’ve never visited before, that I’ve met people I’ve never engaged with before and that I now see incredible opportunity and potential in the continent I live in.

Trying new things and immersing yourself in different opportunities broadens your horizons. And there really are no downfalls – if you don’t enjoy it, leave it at that. But at least you’ll have another interesting story to tell.

If you have any new or unique experiences to share, please send them to me. In the meantime, I look forward to sharing my next adventure with you.

Dare to experience the unexperienced

Written by Kim Potgieter on . Posted in Kim's Blogs, Purpose. No Comments on Dare to experience the unexperienced

I am so grateful to welcome you into 2023, feeling refreshed and optimistic for what the year holds. A new year often brings new beginnings, renewed hope and a fresh perspective. I hope that you enjoyed a restful holiday period and filled your memory jars with many joyful and loving moments with your family and friends.

My habit has always been to start my new year by creating a vision board, and this year, I added something completely different – new dreams. My wish for the year is to step outside of my comfort zone and try something new and different every month.

You may remember reading the article about Jeff Lawrence who took early retirement to turn his passion for baking and bread into a business. He and his wife Sue moved to Wakkerstroom, where Sue now owns the Village Bakery and coffee shop, and Jeff runs Country Bread, supplying bread to local businesses and offering workshops on artisan bread-making.

Jeff is a true example of Retiremeant™ – living his life on his terms and in his own time. Doing what he loves. Not only does Jeff love bread – and to be honest, I don’t know anyone who can resist the smell of freshly baked bread – his passion shines through in everything he does. I was so inspired by Jeff and Sue’s story, coupled with my dream to experience different adventures and learn something new, that I booked a bread-making workshop for my family.

It was an absolute treat! And I’m not just talking about the smells and tastes. Bread-making, as we discovered, is quite a scientific process, and we learnt both the theory and techniques to bake the perfect loaf. Jeff was a wonderful host and teacher and managed to turn a workshop into an intimate bonding and fun-filled experience for our family.

With Gabi, my daughter going into Matric this year and my son Josh entering his final year at university, my dream of trying out, learning and experiencing something new every month perfectly fits into our family dynamic. For me, it does not have to be a learning experience. It could be doing something completely different just for the fun of it. As long as it’s something fresh and different – something I’ve never done before.

Maybe you have new dreams for 2023 too? I know many clients, like me, spend time at the beginning of the year drawing up their wish lists and goals, and editing their Bucket Wheels®. Why not add something completely different? Something unfamiliar and unexperienced? It may just enrich your world and add a fresh spice to life.

We have made some changes to our Inflight newsletter this year. In keeping with the theme of trying new things, we are introducing a segment where we share new experiences to try or things to learn. We are kicking off with padel since it’s taken the country by storm. We are also introducing a segment on retirement villages, and we will interview clients living in retirement villages across the country. Our book of the month is back, and we will review a new book, available in our client library, each month.

Wishing you many new adventures, fun, learning and fresh experiences this year,