Living through Covid-19 (after losing your spouse)

Living through Covid-19 (after losing your spouse)

Roy Irvine shares his experience of losing his wife prior to lockdown and how ‘life goes on’.


Even before Covid-19 was well known outside of China, my 2020 didn’t start off well, as my darling wife and soulmate, lost her battle with cancer in January. We had talked during our 33 years of marriage about the day when one of us would be left without our ‘better-half’, so I had some sort of blueprint to follow.

Thankfully we were able to have a wonderful memorial service in February, which allowed our friends to remember Marita’s life.

I was now left with two lovely daughters, the eldest of whom was already working and settled down, and a fifteen-year-old, who had just started Grade 9.

Then the lockdown started. It influenced us in a number of ways, including having to start with on-line schooling (a steep learning curve for the teachers, students and parents). As my career in mining involved going to sites, or going to the office, all of that stopped, so I had to find a new way of earning some money. As has happened often in my life, the stars aligned, and I was offered work that I could do from home, with very flexible hours, so that I could still run the house, walk the dogs (thanks to Level 3 lockdown), monitor the on-line teaching and try some new things. My wife was a great cook, so I have a fabulous kitchen, a library of cookbooks and a daughter who will eat anything! To set myself up for the day, I now follow ‘The Art of Living Happiness Course’ which uses Yoga and breathing exercises to get you aligned for the day; a much easier and so far, more productive way to start the day, and greet the sun, than my old pursuit of jogging. The course also taught us that the only thing we can control is ‘Now’, so don’t put things off, if you are able to do them now.

One of the items on our life blueprint was that ‘life must go on’, so my new life is not the same as the old one, but is turning out to be wonderful with the support of my daughters, friends and the wonderful teachers at my daughter’s school.

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